Changed again

Sorry...I just can't stop changing my background...mainly because we have 19" monitors at work and all the homemade backgrounds I have seen on blogs don't fit all the way to the edges of the screen...and it DRIVES me batty. So I used a free background again. Now I need to change my banner and signature again I know.

Please pray for my grandma as she was in the hospital from Saturday night to Monday night with chest pains. All her tests came back normal but I am still deeply shaken by it because I wasn't even told until Monday morning through an email my dad sent me...needless to say this had me so upset I cried all day at work. To be left out of something so major as that (especially when my grandmother raised me and is the closest family member I have!) is so deeply disturbing that I can't even describe the burden I have on me right now.

I did have a long post I was going to post about it but I think what goes around comes around and any time you hurt someone you are held accountable and God will judge you in the end for it...it isn't for me to do or to hurt back, but sometimes we do have to stay away from the things that hurt us.

I would like to say to all of you out there who do have close families...be thankful everyday. I have never known what that feels like but I can promise you that my children will have that...at least from Duffer and me. There is nothing more important than family and unfortunately you can't convince the family you have to be close if they choose not to. I have had to come to terms with this and made changes in my life in order for me to not be hurt and for it to not affect my kids but I can say it is the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I have never felt so alone before.

I am sorry for being so vague but the people who are involved do read my blog and they will know what I am referring to. Please pray for every member in my family that they will be driven to correct what is wrong or if not that they can come to terms with it on their own.

House update: We had the home inspection yesterday...only found few minor things but are asking seller to fix (haven't heard back on that yet)...taking money to bank today for appraisal...even though our closing date is currently November 30th we are going to get that pushed up in hopes that we can move before Thanksgiving. Will update when I know more...